1. Get assigned to tank one of the two Death Knight Understudies in the back of Razuvious’ love shack while the priests mind-control the other two.
2. Kill Razuvious with the Understudies still up.
3. Watch both Understudies get the debuff they get when Razuvious dies.
4. Hit Shield Slam on the one you’re tanking, and then charge the other one and Shield Slam him too…
Every raid, sooner or later, is going to have One of Those Nights. Ours was last night. Our MT was sick and our usual pally OT was ret-spec to provide extra DPS, because our #1 DPS fury warrior was out of town for his birthday. We were down a couple of other regulars and couldn’t find enough subs, so when it came time to see the Four Horsemen, Sapphiron, and KT, we had 23 or 24 people, with a couple of lineup changes as we went along.
It was one of those nights were we were just having weird stuff happen. I know I was way off peak performance, with several silly deaths and some flub-ups here and there. In the end, after several wipes, we persevered, and finished clearing Naxxramas. Dessert was a ragged, but ultimately successful, one-shot of Sarth +1 with 22 people.
After we were done celebrating killing Kel’Thuzad, I walked over into what turned out to be KT’s bathroom. Having a bright idea, I managed to pry one of the doors off his medicine cabinet and use it as a shield (see above). Thus, I give you Linedan’s first ilevel 226 epic:
So yes, Linedan is a walking, talking, skull billboard. And if you think that medicine cabinet door is scary, you should see what his toilet seat lid looked like. DO NOT WANT.
I think it may have been that great orcish bard, Muktuk Snakespearer, who once said, “The best-laid plans of meese and moocows, sooner or later, are gonna get an arrow through the eye. Guaranteed.”
Friday night, when the Anvil prepared to hit Naxxramas, we only had 22 people in the raid at go time, and Gothik, Four Horsemen, Sapphiron, and Kel’Thuzad left to clear, with a first attempt at Sartharion +1 afterward if we had time. Real Life did what Real Life does and threw a wrench into the works. Well, even though we are very strict about putting Real Life before Raid Life, we weren’t going to let Real Life dork up our Friday night fun. So the twenty-two of us bravely headed through the Green Skulls of Three Times The Mob Health, and buffed up…
…and blew the place apart with 22 people. Gothik, dead. Four Horsemen, dead. Sartharion, dead. Neidermeyer…
For KT, we knew we would need a little more firepower, so we managed to get two of our Thursday night regulars who don’t generally come with us on Fridays to join up. That brought us up to 24, and 24 is what we went with as we charged into Kel’Thuzad’s lair.
After two wipes, we were sailing along pretty good on our third attempt until the MT died with Big Nasty at around 56%. My spinal tanky reflexes kicked in–I was technically #3 on the tank list behind the MT and a prot paladin, but I mashed Taunt and grabbed agro on Kel’Thuzad, then moved to where our MT had died. I figured I’d hold him until they battle-rezzed and rebuffed Gorebash (our MT) and he could take back over, and I’d move back to my melee spot and get ready to grab Guardians of Icecrown when they came out (my designated job).
Instead, over Vent I heard: “OK, leave Lin on KT, Gore and I will pick up the Guardians.”
Two thoughts flashed through my head, in this order: Holy shit, I’m tanking Kel’thuzad!, followed by, oh God, PLEASE DO NOT LET ME FUCK THIS UP.
We got him. I didn’t die. I didn’t get hit by a single frostbolt because our melee and Wind Shocking shaman were on top of their game. The healing was perfect. All I had to do was stand there and mash my normal buttons, nothing different. We were hanging on by our thumbnails at the end with a few deaths, but dammit, we got him, and that’s what counted.
What did we do after that for an encore? Headed a little south to the Obsidian Sanctum and one-shot our first 25-man attempt at Sarth +1, that’s what. With me tanking Sartharion. Sartharion is a ridiculously easy fight to maintank (at least with zero or one drake up) as long as you position him right on the pull. Put him in the right spot on the east end of his island, and it’s no more than six steps to either side for safety when the lava walls roll through.
So I accidentally got to maintank Kel’thuzad, and intentionally got to maintank Sartharion. And, oh yeah, I got my Tier 7.5 breastplate. And all I really wanted to do last night, besides downing the bosses, was test out if a slight tweak to my actionbars would improve my threat and my deeps. (It did. I’ll post more on that later.)
Just watch out for the burnt marshmallow seals.
EDIT: OK, it’s a month old. I’m that far behind the times. Don’t hate, yo.
Clean one-shot for The Anvil Raid’s first 25-man Kel’Thuzad kill. Then we celebrated by going out and doing our first Sartharion 25-man (no drakes), also on a clean one-shot. The dargon gave me a nice pair of pants, too.
Next week, we’ll hopefully get KT again with enough spare time to start on Sarth +1.
1. Sir Zeliek’s chain holy bolts really hurt…especially a 45k one right to the nuts when you’re charging him after finishing off Baron Rivendare.
2. Patchwerk is in cahoots with occupational therapists. I can’t otherwise explain why Blizzard designed a fight that’s guaranteed to give the tanks carpal tunnel syndrome from all the frantic button-mashing.
3. 25-man geared death knight tanks with 40,000 buffed health are freaking scary.
3a. They’re freaking scarier when you’re trying to stay ahead of them on threat. Good Lord.
4. There is no problem that cannot be solved by a suitable application of 4000 dps fury warrior directly to Noth’s forehead.
5. Hey Gothik, STFU AND START SUMMONING K? WE’RE RUNNING LATE CLEARING THIS WING.
6. Taunt and Charge do not do the same thing. Charge is that button that puts you in facepull range of an entire alcove in Kel’Thuzad’s room. Do not ask me how I know this.
7. No, I didn’t die, that was a Death Knight Captain. I can’t help it if all my 25-man tank gear makes me LOOK like a Death Knight Captain, can I?
8. When you’re the #4 tank on a four-tank raid? You don’t tank all that much. LEET PROT WARRIOR DPS MODE ACTIVA…uh, never mind. *hides DPS meter*
9. I am not a “slack-jawed daffodill.” I’m a special snowflake.
10. Make out your will, Kel’Thuzad. You’re going down tonight, buddy.