Achtung Panzercow

If I can't be a shining example, at least I'll be an object lesson.

Posts Tagged ‘wtf’

Swamp of Sorrows was merely a setback

Posted by Linedan on August 12, 2009

HELL.  FUCKING.  YES.

She has lurked in her lair and done battle with the many brave adventurers who travelled to that familiar location over the years. Now, in honor of the World of Warcraft 5-year anniversary, the dreaded brood mother Onyxia is being revamped to make a return to the forefront of Azeroth, as part of our big plans for the upcoming 3.2.2 content patch.

This permanent update to Onyxia will convert the dungeon into 10- and 25-player modes. We will be adding new items to Onyxia’s loot table that have the same model as some of the classic loot from this dungeon, like Tier 2 helms, with stats updated to match the current level of content. There will be a special new item too: a normal drake-sized 310% speed flying mount modeled after Onyxia herself called an Onyxia Broodling. We will also be updating the encounter mechanics to be more fitting for modern raiding, but we can guarantee players will get to experience the frightening horror of deep breaths once again.

The first time I ever ran with an Onyxia raid, it was the scariest, most amazing experience I’d ever been a part of in World of Warcraft.  It’s still right up there at the top over three years later.  If you didn’t play back when Ony was end-game content, you missed something pretty special.  The old girl was hard.  I mean, wipe-all-night hard.  But more than that, the feel of the fight was just incredibly epic.  This humongous dragon flying around dropping firebombs everywhere, clouds of whelps eating everybody’s face, the third phase of the fight where she’s fear-bombing and the floor’s shaking and lava is spewing out of cracks and the sound is deafening…daaaamn.  It was amazing.

You have no idea how happy I am Blizzard’s going to dust off Lady Prestor and make her back into the bitch she’s meant to be.

AFTER-THE-FACT EDIT:  Thanks to Spinks for pointing out that I got my swamps mixed up.  Too late to change the title now, so I’ll just have to save face by claiming I did it for the alliteration and hope that y’all buy my line of bullshit.

Posted in raid | Tagged: , , | 9 Comments »

It takes a special kind of stupid…

Posted by Linedan on July 16, 2009

…to play “let’s pretend I’m a terrorist” and announce, in WoW, that you’re going to hijack an airplane.

The 18-year-old from Johnson County, Indiana, said that he “was going to board a plane at 7:30 to Chicago and that (he) was going to try and kill as many Americans as possible,” reports Destructioid. Apparently, the moron in question repeated this claim more than once, which I imagine is similar to smashing your foot with a sledgehammer, then repeatedly doing it over and over again to see if it’ll still hurt.

Predictably, Blizzard employees saw the announcements and notified the proper authorities. The teen quickly backpedaled, claiming that someone had hacked his account, but that didn’t stop the FBI from seizing his computer to investigate the incident further.

The money quote from the article?  “Ten bucks says he was a blood elf death knight.”  Ouch.

Posted in random | Tagged: | 2 Comments »